每一次我和我的姑婆在车里的时候,她一定会一边驾车,一边讲话!讲那些废话!真是的!讲那些大道理,这是啰唆到要命!不是讲那些grocery什么什么起价了啦…… 什么sale sale 啦~ 那些对我一点都没有兴趣的!Shut up and drive 啦!Jesus!
比如:
(My grandaunt is driving…)
“Ying ah… you better study lo… The exams are coming… you really need to study lo…”
"Yes Ko Poh… I will…," “Jesus.” I muttered.
Oh great, here comes the “cheap, offer, expensive, grocery” grandaunt talking. Talking… and talking… and… talking…
“Don’t say ‘I will… I will…’ and then don’t do… OK?”
“Yes, Ko Poh…”
“And by the way, last time we see the liquid paper… it’s 6 dollars over, right? Jusco is having a sale… If you’re interested, I can buy for you at a much cheaper price. It’s only 5.20 in Jusco… and there’s another one… In Giant… got offer leh… it’s only 6.20 for two. We better buy that… And the Skin Food lip gloss you kept saying on and on about that… It’s having a sale in The Mines… and the powder compact… huh… so expensive! 89.90!…”
“Ko Poh… there’s a dog right in front of you!! You better shut… I mean, stop talking… I mean, stop driving for a while FOR CHRIS’S SAKE!!!”
But, of course my promoter… I mean, grandaunt doesn’t get the damn MESSAGE!!
Instead, she said…
“Oh! Where?! I never see the dog one…”
(But, you should see that I lied… I mean, “said” that there’s a dog in front and my grandaunt is going to hit it… hoping that she’ll shut up for a little damn while… but… what do you want me to reply? Said that I lied that a dog is in front of the car just to hope that she’ll SHUT UP?!)
“Oh… I think the dog heard you talking because you’re talking so loud just now and get off the road before you hit it.” I said LOUDLY, hoping she’ll get the damn message saying: “Oh Jesus Ko Poh! SHUT UP I’m trying to listen Rihanna’s “Shut Up and Drive” song just for one second. And you keep talking about STUPID liquid paper saying that they are WAY CHEAPER… WHICH OF COURSE I DON’T CARE ABOUT AT ALL?! Jesus!”
But of course I didn’t say these hurtful words to my little annoying talkative (and I mean, WAY TALKATIVE!!) grandaunt!!!
“But… Am I really talking so loud?”
“Yes! You don’t know?!”
“Oh… good then! I saved a dog’s life!”
Oh, by the way, did I mention that she’s also VERY stupid sometimes?! Jesus!
“Erm… yeah… you save a dog’s life. Yee pee.” :-(
“You know… I once saw a floral print shirt that is so cheap…”
“Oh no…”
(Insert the video of Rihanna’s “Shut Up and Drive”)